A Staging Ground for Care

Corey Nieman / Director Caring Network and Assistant Spiritual Formation and IGNITE

Photo by Kelly Sikkema on Unsplash

Then the LORD said to Cain, "Where is your brother Abel?" "I don't know," he replied. "Am I my brother's keeper?" (Genesis 4:9) The answer to that question is yes, I am my brother’s keeper. But what does that mean? To me it always meant taking care of those less fortunate than myself usually in the form of homeless, poverty-stricken, or malnourished people. But what never dawned on me is that this creed doesn’t just cover the “underserved populations,” but also those who appear to have it all together.

I recently took a mission trip to Give Kids the World in Orlando, FL. This is a staging ground resort for Make-a-Wish families. My son and I went to be of service to the families, so all their needs would be met for the week as they traveled to and from Disney and Universal Studios, etc. The one thing that struck me the most was that for every ten families you would encounter, only one would have a child that was in a wheelchair, or on oxygen, or in some way appear terminally ill. In fact, we were instructed not to hug the children as many had hidden ports, monitors, and tubes concealed under their clothes. So, on the surface everyone was staying in this lavish resort, having all their needs catered to, and having what seemed like the time of their lives … but underneath it all was a world of pain and inevitable loss that was so overwhelming to think about.

But this was not the real challenge that faced me; in fact, this trip was a staging ground of sorts for another caregiving endeavor. As soon as I returned home from Orlando, I was to spend ten days living with my father who has advanced Parkinson’s disease as a result of schizophrenic medications he has been on all his life. I was fairly terrified about this prospect and asked the GKTW team to pray that this trip would prepare me for what was to come back in Buffalo. Over the years I had distanced myself a bit from my dad because at different points in his Parkinson’s journey his medications to stabilize the tremors would unexpectedly cancel out his psych medications. So not only could he and I no longer work on projects together, we often times could not have rational conversations either. 

So, I asked God to use the GKTW trip to prepare my heart to care for my dad. Had I taken this responsibility on at any other time in my life I would not have been able to handle it on any level. Yet God was so gracious to me and my dad. Jesus was there for every spoon-fed meal, every assist with an outfit change, every hour dispensing medications (25+pills per day), every time my dad was shaking so bad I could not understand the words coming out of his mouth, not to mention every bathroom trip tended to be a “Go with God” cliffhanger-type moment. Yet through every trial, God provided me with patience, empathy, levity, and grace so that I was able to not only handle it but enjoy our time together. Sure, there were times where I began to feel sorry for myself and my dad, but God sent us many friends and family to lend a helping hand. This was a great test for me, but rather than exclaim “I did it,” I praise God for the promise that He delivered on! 

“The LORD is near to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.”

Psalm 34:18