Drag What is Dark into the Light
Corey Nieman / Director of Caring Network
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| Photo by Jan Huber on Unsplash |
As I take stock over these last two years, I realize that I could not manage my life without God, my wife, and my church. The highlights have included honoring my parent’s 50th wedding anniversary on the Jersey Shore, watching my son graduate from high school, taking an all-expense paid family trip to Disney/Universal, my wife and I celebrating 20 years of marriage, moving into a nicer home, and being brought on senior staff here at the church. But the low points have been my dad’s death from Parkinson’s, my wife’s uncle’s death two weeks later, my wife getting seriously ill, two car accidents, cancer in my 17-year-old’s lung, and a bad house renovation. So many highs and lows, and the only balance came in the form of God’s love and my brothers and sisters in Christ.
All these events happened to coincide with launching Regeneration Recovery Ministry and then, together with my wife, Jill, ReEngage Marriage Ministry. These two care groups saved me from focusing on the things going wrong, but rather giving God the glory in it all. If you have never entered into a care group such as Griefshare, DivorceCare, Regen, ReEngage, etc., you are missing out. The Bible says we are to share our burdens with one another. There is something so powerful with not just commiserating with one another, but anticipating what God is going to do in the midst of our struggles and trials.
All these events happened to coincide with launching Regeneration Recovery Ministry and then, together with my wife, Jill, ReEngage Marriage Ministry. These two care groups saved me from focusing on the things going wrong, but rather giving God the glory in it all. If you have never entered into a care group such as Griefshare, DivorceCare, Regen, ReEngage, etc., you are missing out. The Bible says we are to share our burdens with one another. There is something so powerful with not just commiserating with one another, but anticipating what God is going to do in the midst of our struggles and trials.
In ReGen I realized that I had made an idol of being a hope ambassador, that somehow I was the hope giver to the many who were without it. In the midst of 2020, I was taught the other side of that coin, to be a hope recipient. God reminded me that He is the source of hope in the midst of my son’s cancer journey, during COVID, and our nine-month renovation. The people at ReGen and this church surrounded us with prayers and blessings. That is a lesson I will never forget.
Just like the extended pandemic, last year was brutal with deaths in the family and sickness, and such. Yet, Jill and I felt so blessed to get ReEngage launched for the first session. Doing life with those couples and hearing their testimonies bolstered our faith. In the midst of that God taught my wife and I lessons of humility, conflict resolution, mercy, and more. Were it not for that group encouraging us to reinvest in our marriage, we would not have endured these past two years of our marriage well. These have been the hardest two years of the twenty we have been together.
The reason I am saying all this is to encourage you to look at yourselves through the eyes of the Holy Spirit and ask Him to enlighten you as to what needs working on in this season. Many of us have been coping with things, and trying to medicate or escape reality, but perhaps now we need to work on some vices. We all have something that has been tested within us these past two years, and many of these things will remain unresolved going forward if we are not intentional about dealing with them in a biblical way. Asking for help is not a sign of weakness, but rather a strength because the enemy has us where he wants us when we keep things to ourselves, and when we remain isolated.
Just like the extended pandemic, last year was brutal with deaths in the family and sickness, and such. Yet, Jill and I felt so blessed to get ReEngage launched for the first session. Doing life with those couples and hearing their testimonies bolstered our faith. In the midst of that God taught my wife and I lessons of humility, conflict resolution, mercy, and more. Were it not for that group encouraging us to reinvest in our marriage, we would not have endured these past two years of our marriage well. These have been the hardest two years of the twenty we have been together.
The reason I am saying all this is to encourage you to look at yourselves through the eyes of the Holy Spirit and ask Him to enlighten you as to what needs working on in this season. Many of us have been coping with things, and trying to medicate or escape reality, but perhaps now we need to work on some vices. We all have something that has been tested within us these past two years, and many of these things will remain unresolved going forward if we are not intentional about dealing with them in a biblical way. Asking for help is not a sign of weakness, but rather a strength because the enemy has us where he wants us when we keep things to ourselves, and when we remain isolated.
In addition to that, the most potent lesson God has shown me in this timeframe is that if we become offended by one another, or with God, we begin to harbor unforgiveness. Over time, if you combine being isolated with unforgiveness you will be in some serious spiritual turmoil. So, to avoid this formula for disaster, reach out for help, reach out to God, be quick to forgive, become part of the fellowship, drag what is dark into the light. For this is where true healing and reconciliation begin.